Saving Private Windows

I heard from Mike Arrington this morning. Good to hear the familiar voice now wrapped in the aura of rich and retired. Of course, he’s no fool and realizes quitting is not an option. If we stop doing whatever that is, we throw life in the dumpster. Nothing good follows. He may be crazy but he’s not stupid. How come you’re not writing for us, he begins. Actually, he tries first to confirm some rumor he’s either been fed or made up about Salesforce. I recognize this is as a test, designed to illustrate my ethically challenged new reality now that I work for Marc Benioff instead of just plain admiring what he and his company are doing from the alleged neutrality of the media. That while asking me to resume writing: Please deliver your debunked credibility to my (uh, AOL’s) firebrand flagship disruptive media leader. So I remind him of the numerous times I’ve sat next to him as he rides around town beating the story out of some hapless deer caught in his headlights, and that he’s getting nothing because I’ve seen this movie. Unfortunately, what he really wants is for me to write some of this patented stream of consciousness drivel for him so I can be ignored and berated by the 12 year olds who are just waiting to push me into the grave and shovel the worm-riddled dirt over my irrelevant pundit ass.